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AEW Dynamite Results – 3/31/21 (Arcade Anarchy, Christian Cage vs. Kazarian, Lucha Trios)

Dynamite episodes outside of Jacksonville postponed due to COVID-19

aew dynamite results 3 31 21 arcade anarchy christian cage vs kazarian lucha trios
AEW Dynamite Results
March 31, 2021

Jacksonville, Florida (Daily’s Place)
Results by: Josh Boutwell of Wrestleview.com

“The Instant Classic” Christian Cage (0-0) vs. Frankie Kazarian (11-0)

Christian and Kazarian actually faced off twice in TNA with Christian winning one and Kazarian winning one. They actually faced for the first time back in 2001 when Christian and Edge faced Nova and Kazarian – who were known as The Evolution – in a California independent promotion.

Christian and Kaz lockup and mat wrestle for a few minutes and Kazarian hangs with him throughout this sequence. They exchange some submissions and Christian gets dumped through the ropes and onto the ramp. Kaz then backdrops Christian into the ring but walks into an elbow from Captain Charisma. Christian climbs up top and attempts a Tornado DDT but Kaz blocks it and shoves Christian off the top crashing to the floor.

Kaz taunts Christian and holds the ropes open for him to get back in but then swings at him only for Christian to avoid it and then attempt a shoulder block but Kaz sidesteps him and hits a Guillotine Leg Drop to the back of Christian’s neck. Kazarian puts Christian in a chinlock but he fights out only for Kaz to lock in a Front Chancery. Christian manages to break the hold but Kaz hits him with a series of knees and then a Spinning Neckbreaker for two.

Kazarian hits a Backdrop for another two and then he stands on Christian’s neck. Christian fights back with some slaps but Kazarian takes him down again and then throws him into the corner. Kazarian charges into a boot from Christian and Christian follows up with the Swinging DDT out of the corner for a nearfall.

Christian hits a Flying Forearm and then a series of slaps before standing on Kaz’s back as he was hung over the ropes. Christian climbs to the top and dives off with a Corkscrew Uppercut for another nearfall. Christian mounts Kaz in the corner and lays into him with rights. Kazarian and Christian trade rollups and then Kaz goes for a Crossface Chicken Wing, but Christian elbows out of it. Christian goes for the Unprettier but Kaz blocks it and dumps him with a backdrop. Christian gets back up and hits a Reverse DDT.

Christian goes up top and attempts a Frog Splash but Kazarian rolls out of the way. Kazarian locks in the Crossface Chicken Wing in the center of the ring but manages to scoot his bottom half to the ropes to break the hold. Kazarian slaps Christian and taunts him until Christian rolls him up for two. Kazarian strings together a back kick followed by a knee left and then a Lariat followed by a Springboard Guillotine Leg Drop for a close nearfall.

Kazarian lifts Christian up to the top rope and goes for a Superplex but Christian holds on to the top rope to block it. Kazarian headbutts Christian and then hits the Flux Capacitor! 1…2…NO Christian kicks out! Kazarian looks shocked at Christian kicking out and starts taunting him. Christian goes for the Unprettier but Kaz blocks it and hangs Christian up in the ropes. Kaz goes for the Guillotine Leg Drop again but Christian moves this time and then goes up top and hits the Frog Splash! 1…2…NO Kaz kicks out!

Christian goes for the Unprettier again and Kaz counters into the Crossface but Christian rolls backwards and throws Kaz into the ring post and then hits the Unprettier for the pin!

Winner: Christian via pinfall (Unprettier)

Darby Allin and Sting cut a promo with Darby saying that Matt Hardy’s body is breaking down and he is buying people’s respect when once he earned it.

A pissed off Jon Moxley earlier today says he can’t get the sound out of his head of the Good Brothers taking his brother, Kingston, out. He says the Bucks can’t figure out whether they want to be in the fight or not and he asks what side they are on. He says he still has burns on his skin and that pisses him off, too. Moxley says he told AEW that Cezar Bononi looks good and they could make some money with him but not if he kills him. He says someone is getting dropped on their head tonight.

“Death Rider” Jon Moxley (6-3) vs. Cezar Bononi (4-4) w/Ryan Nemeth

Moxley and Bononi exchange strikes and then run into each other. Bononi runs Mox over and beats on him in the corner. Moxley blocks a kick and hits a Kneebreaker followed by a Dragonscrew Leg Whip. Moxley works on Cezar’s knee and then puts him in a Half Crab. Ryan Nemeth trips Moxley from the outside allowing Bononi to hit a Vertical Suplex for two.

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—-COMMERCIAL BREAK—-

Moxley avoids a Flying Knee from Bononi and then goes for a German Suplex. Bononi elbows Moxley but Mox comes back with a series of stiff elbows followed by a Roaring Elbow and then a big Lariat. Moxley hits a German Suplex on the big man and then a Corner Clothesline. He lifts Bononi up to the top rope and hits a Superplex for two. Moxley immediately transitions into the Cross Armbreaker but JD Drake distracts the referee. Nemeth tries to break up the Armbreaker but eats a Paradigm Shift for his troubles. Bononi hits Moxley from behind and goes for a Pump Handle Slam but Moxley escapes and locks in the Rear Naked Choke. Bononi passes out and Moxley gets the win.

Winner: Moxley via KO (Rear Naked Choke)

Team Taz has a message for AEW and Taz says everything is fine with them despite what the internet says, but Ricky Starks interrupts him and he feels like old times after they all teamed together on AEW Dark. He asks Cage what he thinks and Cage says it’s a first for Starks wanting his opinion and says he thinks if he tagged Cage in sooner they might have won earlier. Taz stops them from arguing and says everything is fine with the group.

In the Pinnacle locker room MJF says he has a gift for his boys and introduces their new personal stylist that he is giving them. MJF has an interior decorator to redecorate the locker room and then opens the bathroom where the Inner Circle is standing! They jump the Pinnacle and a brawl is on! They brawl all throughout the backstage area with Sammy Guevara hitting a GTS on Spears and then slamming his head in between the door and doorway Ric Flair-Fall Brawl style.

Jake Hager Chokeslams Wardlow through a trainer’s table and PNP lays waste to FTR. They throw Cash Wheeler into an ice bath and Santana uses a damn broken leg of a chair to stab Dax’s head! Jericho drags MJF into the bathroom and gives his ass a swirly! Jericho tells MJF that the worst is yet to come and then slams his head through an ice cooler. “This is our dressing room, bitch,” Jericho says as he pours some bubbly out on MJF.

Alex Marvez interviews the Young Bucks elsewhere in the Dynamite Zone (my name, no one freak out). Don Callis interrupts them and says he has some family business with the Bucks. Nick walks away and Callis says he needs to talk to Matt. He says he thought Matt loved Kenny Omega like he did and he says he broke Kenny’s heart. Callis says he chose AEW over Japan or the WWE because of the Bucks and he says the Bucks turned their backs on family. He asks Matt if he is so dead inside that he feels nothing for the people that love him and asks him what is wrong with him. Callis slaps Matt and Matt almost attacks him but he stops. Callis asks if there is anything left inside Matt and calls him pathetic before walking away.

—-COMMERCIAL BREAK—-

Trios Match
The Lucha Brothers & Laredo Kid (1-0) vs. Kenny Omega & The Good Brothers w/Don Callis

The Lucha Brothers cut a promo during their entrance – picture in picture – with Alex translating. Penta says they are coming for all the titles. Penta backdrops Laredo Kid over the top onto Omega and GB and then Fenix hits an Asai Moonsault onto them! Laredo Kid and Lucha Brothers Superkick Omega’s face off.

They Superkick GB and then hit Triple Superkicks on Omega for a one count until Anderson breaks up the pin attempt. LB dump them to the floor and then Penta and Fenix hit stereo Somersault Planchas while Laredo Kid hits an Asai Moonsault on the heels at the same time!

Laredo Kid hits a Suplex on Omega in the ring and follows up with a Moonsault from the bottom rope and then a Moonsault from the middle rope for two. Kenny Omega elbows Laredo and then tags in DOC Gallows. Anderson kicks Laredo from behind and Gallows lays him out with a Roundhouse Kick. Gallows tosses Laredo into the Bullet Club corner and lays into him with a series of body shots.

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Anderson tags in and hits a Backbreaker on Laredo for two. Anderson goes super lucha and starts ripping Laredo’s mask before tagging Kenny. Omega hits a Muta Elbow for two and tosses him into the boots of both Gallows and Anderson. Gallows tags back in and hits a Big Boot. Gallows hits an Elbow Drop for another two. Gallows hits another Elbow Drop and gets another two.

—-COMMERCIAL BREAK—-

Omega and the Brothers continued to work Laredo Kid over during the break and when we come back Gallows hits a big Scoop Slam. Omega and Anderson then knock LB off the apron and Omega lifts Gallows on his back and stands over Laredo as Anderson dives onto their backs for a Triple Splash! 1…2…NO Laredo kicks out! Gallows puts Laredo in a Chinlock but he fights it off and counters a Suplex into a Spinning DDT!

Laredo Kid makes the hot tag to Penta and he hits a Sling Blade on Anderson and then one for Omega! Fenix tags in and hits a Rolling Double Cutter on them, too! Penta and Fenix do the Cartwheel Splash combo on them. Fenix tags Laredo and he hits a Springboard Moonsault, Penta tags in and hits a Ghetto Stomp, Fenix tags in and hits a Springboard Swanton Bomb for two on Anderson!

Penta kicks Omega to the floor and LB work over Anderson with kicks in the corner. Gallows pulls Laredo to the floor and Omega pulls Penta out and slams him into the barricade. The Club work over Fenix in the corner and hit a Triple Assisted Neckbreaker for two but Penta breaks up the pin. Anderson and Fenix pair off as the rest brawl on the floor.

Anderson hits a Mafia Kick for two and Anderson is pissed he kicked out. GB go for the Magic Killer but Penta kicks Anderson. Laredo hits a Springboard Missile Dropkick but Omega hits him with a Roaring Elbow. Fenix hits the Hook Kick off the ropes and Penta hits the Mexican Destroyer on Omega! Fenix springboards into a Spinebuster from Anderson! Laredo hits a Springboard Elbow Drop to break up a pin attempt from Anderson.

Omega and Laredo tag in at the same time and Omega kills him with a Elbow Smash. Laredo answers with a Superman Elbow and then goes for a Springboard Rana only for Omega to counter into a Powerbomb followed by the V-Trigger! 1…2…NO Laredo kicks out! Omega goes for the One Winged Angel but Laredo counters with a Rana sending Omega to the floor! Laredo hits an INSANE Tope Suicida onto Omega on the outside!

Penta hits a Springboard Somersault Planhca onto Good Brothers on the outside. Laredo drags Omega back in the ring and Laredo blocks a V-Trigger and hits a Enziguri. Fenix hits a Rope Walk Punt Kick on Omega and Laredo drops Omega with a Michinoku Driver! 1…2…NO Omega kicks out!

Laredo goes up top and attempts a Phoenix Splash but Omega moves and hits the V-Trigger! Omega hits the One Winged Angle for the pin.

Winners: Omega & Good Brothers via pinfall (One Winged Angel)

Jon Moxley walks out and looks like he’s contemplating getting in the ring when the Young Bucks walk up behind him and stand with Moxley. They jump in the ring but Omega and Good Brothers bail.

—-COMMERCIAL BREAK—-

Dr. Britt Baker talks about AEW Dark: Elevation and says it is a wonderful platform for Thunder Rosa to get her wins up against rookies. She reminds us the Lights Out Match was unsanctioned, so it doesn’t count in the official records.

Tay Conti (9-2) & Hikaru Shida (4-0) w/The Dark Order vs. Nyla Rose (5-3) & Allie (1-0) w/Vickie Guerrero & The Hardy Family Office

The Dark Order accompanies Shida and Conti to the ring. Conti is wearing a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu gi and Shida is wearing a Karate (I believe) gi. Allie and Rose attack the babyfaces as they get in the ring and take turns beating Shida down. Conti kicks Allie into a Judo Throw from Shida. Shida goes for the Fujiwara Armbar but Allie gets to the ropes. Shida drags Allie to the apron and hits her with a Running Knee Lift. Shida gets in Hardy’s face and Rose attacks her from behind.

—-COMMERCIAL BREAK—-

Conti hits a Bicycle Knee and Allie rolls to the floor but eats a Punt Kick from Conti. Conti hits a Swinging Backbreaker and stares Hardy down. Hardy acts like he is going to hit Conti which causes the Dark Order to attack and a big brawl ensues. Conti hits the TayKO on Allie in the ring but Rose breaks up her pin attempt. Shida dives off Conti’s back into a Flying Knee sending Rose to the floor. Shida dives off the top but HFO catch her only for Conti to then dive onto them as well!

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Allie grabs a kendo stick and hits Conti with it as Vickie distracts the referee. Allie this the Down the Rabbit Hole for the pin.

Winner: Allie via pinfall (Down the Rabbit Hole)

Jurassic Express cuts a promo about their match with Bear Country next week. Jungle Boy makes a Godzilla vs. Kong reference and they notice Marko has a King Kong tattoo, which makes Luchasaurus unhappy.

—-COMMERCIAL BREAK—-

Main Event
Arcade Anarchy Match
The Best Friends (Orange Cassidy & Chuck Taylor) vs. Miro & Kip Sabian w/Penelope Ford

The only way to win is pinfall or submission. There are a bunch of arcade games and other goodies surrounding ringside. Miro tosses Chucky around with a Fall Away Slam, while OC and Sabian brawl around near a Wack-A-Mole machine. OC slams his head through it and starts hitting him with the hammer only for Miro to run his ass over.

Miro slams OC into the ring post and dumps him on the floor. Miro props a barricade up ringside but Taylor attacks him from behind and Best Friends attempt to Suplex him onto it. Miro fights them off and Suplexes Taylor on the barricade and throws OC into another one! Miro drags OC back in the ring and grabs a chair off the prize rack they have set up with a bunch of weapons. Miro hits OC with a bunch of nasty elbows and then wedges the chair in the corner.

OC tries to fight Miro off but Miro slams his face into the chair. OC rolls to the floor and as Miro chases him Taylor dives off an arcade machine onto Miro. Taylor slams Miro’s face into the ring post and OC grabs a trashcan lid off the award rack and hits Miro with it. Chuck hits Miro with a kendo stick as OC hits him with the lid at the same time.

OC and Taylor pick up the barricade and run Miro over with it. They dump a table over on top of Miro followed by a ton of weapons and then an arcade machine. They try to pin Miro under all that but Sabian breaks up the pin attempt. Sabian kicks OC’s head through a wall and German Suplexes Taylor on the floor! Sabian kicks the rest of OC through the wall!

Taylor kicks Sabian into an arcade cabinet and then grabs a teddy bear and rips the back off it revealing legos. He pours the Legos on the mat. “Have you ever stepped on a damn Lego,” Schiavone asks. Taylor attempts to Superplex Sabian onto the Legos but Sabian counters and Powerbombs Taylor onto them! 1…2…NO OC breaks it up! OC hits a Tornado DDT onto the Legos and then a Beach Break! 1…2…NO Sabian kicks out!

OC hits the Orange Punch! 1…2…NO Penelope Ford pulls the referee out. Ford then kicks OC in the nuts and pulls her belt off. Kris Statlander appears in a claw machine! She breaks the glass open and slams it into Ford’s face! Statlander Michinoku Drivers Ford through a freaking Air Hockey table off the ring apron! Miro goes absolutely ape shit as he tosses OC and Taylor all around the place. He grabs a chair and starts beating their asses like they owe him money.

Miro sets up a table as a van is shown driving up with Trent Baretta jumping out of the back! Trentylocks is back, son! The Best Friends jump Miro together! Miro fights them all off like a damn beast! He slams Trent into a wall and starts waving at Trent’s mom in the van. Miro jumps on top of the van but Trent comes from behind and slams Miro’s face into the hood.

Miro grabs a Mortal Kombat arcade cabinet and literally throws it at Trent but he moves and Trent throws a damn stool at Miro and connects. Trent Spears Miro through the table! Taylor grabs Sabian and Powerslams him off the stage through tables for the pin!

Winners: Best Friends via pinfall (Powerslam off the stage)

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